The Grass Is Always Greener…

by The Mayor!

Funny golf balls sign image…on golf courses. Except I don’t golf. Like, ever. Anyone who knows me well would know better than to allow me the opportunity to get my hands on such a weapon. But given my foul mood of late, maybe it’s high time I took up golf. Failing that, however, there are other ways to find my greener grass. Margaritas spiked with valium is always a good place to start. And it never hurts to have old friends with strong shoulders who are willing to let you dump on them mercilessly. Of course, as any mother knows, those rotten brats of ours can always break through even the foulest of moods & bring us to greener pastures. The Baby, all dolled up & giddy with excitement over her first school pictures today. My Bunny, in full Bunny mode, shouting in my face about being picked to fly in one of their cheer stunts. The Diva, throwing a tantrum because she ISN’T flying in one of her big stunts. The Boy, with his Lego & men spread out all over my house, not because he’s a 12 year old baby, but because he’s a 12 year old military strategist, creating entire wars from the ground up, & hoping to learn how to write code so he can transfer it all in to the world of gaming. The Diva fighting Pillow Cat for possession of her pillow, every single night. The other cat who lives & breathes for The Boy & can only ever be found in or around his bed…& occasionally sleeping on his clean underwear if he leaves his closet door open. Which leads me to warnGrassIsAlwaysGreener him about wearing furry underwear to school on gym days. My Bunny actually bringing home TWO A’s on math tests since school began, & a teacher I had concerns about, offering her one on one time to help her with it. Giving back to our community by being involved with Haiti relief, the Terry Fox Run, & fund raising for the cheer gym with my kids, as well as helping one of my clients with their Christmas Turkey Drive. Beginning The Diva’s spiritual journey through First Reconciliation & First Communion now that she’s in Grade 2, & looking forward to the epic shopping trip of buying THIS fashionista a First Communion gown. And the highly amusing game of helping her decide what, exactly, she should confess to! Having tiny paper hearts taped all over my bedroom wall, courtesy of The Baby, while she prances around the house singing all the old favourites she’s learning at school, from “Sunday, Monday…”, to “The Hokey Pokey”….& the look of delight when Mommy chimes in & she realizes I, too, know all of these little ditties. So yes, we can have greener grass…we just have to open our eyes wide enough to see the colours all around us. Of course, you won’t judge me too harshly if I keep that spiked margarita close at hand…just in case…

Signed,

The Mayor!

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{ 10 comments… read them below or add one }

Alexandra September 28, 2010 at 5:33 am

Oh, this post reminds me of a kind woman I met in a store years ago. I was lamenting shopping for my children in the kids dept., no more toddler dept. And it hit me hard.

She said, “yes, things change, it’s hard. But just wait and see what good friends they’ll become for you.”

*snif*

KLZ September 28, 2010 at 7:40 am

I’m on board with your spiked margarita.

I myself carry a golf club at all times. Just in case there are some balls that need to be hit.
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Pamela September 28, 2010 at 10:21 am

Well – if you can see the greener pastures, then there’s no reason why I can’t too! Thanks for the great insight, Mayor – I’ll take your advice & keep at least some Valium handy too, you know, just in case;)
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themombshell September 28, 2010 at 4:52 pm

Confession?! You catholics are crazy with that shiz. There isn’t enough margarita mix in the world for this girl to prep for that.
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The Mayor! September 28, 2010 at 6:13 pm

LOL…thankfully, I am NOT the Catholic one….thus I am able to pawn much of it off on The Dad, who is. Though I’m happy enough to go along with it all to have them in such an amazing school…& shop for the tiny little wedding gowns LOL!

The Mayor! September 28, 2010 at 6:14 pm

Well of course, why else would women ever bother to carry a golf club??!! ;-) )

The Mayor! September 28, 2010 at 6:16 pm

The colours are definitely prettier with a good dose of valium in hand LOL…so I’m told, anyways… ;-) )

The Mayor! September 28, 2010 at 6:18 pm

I can see that….not that I’m ready for that, but I can see it… sigh…. :-(

Stacy September 29, 2010 at 1:28 am

I need to seriously consider opening up a shop selling those wonderful candy valium necklaces that I always talk about eh! giggle Thank God kids can take our minds off of our troubles with something cute and sweet. Almost enough to make you forget that you hate stupid people!!! (but not quite…go margarita (ville) lol ;)

Sandra September 29, 2010 at 1:24 pm

You just described my life (remember, I have four kids in school too)…although I didn’t realize how exhausting my life was until I read it detailed in this post. Thanks for that…any extra room in that anger management class for me?
I think you need to come over Saturday night, I found a great recipe for banana ice cream vodka drinks!
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