‘Twas the week before Christmas, & all through the house,
Mom’s going crazy, while Dad’s getting soused.
The stockings are hung, haphazard & worn,
And the Christmas decor is tattered & torn.
The children are whiny, all sick in their beds,
While feverish nightmares dance in their heads.
And me with my eye twitch, bespeaking my plight,
Is horribly sleep deprived from wrapping all night.
When all through the house, there arose such a clatter,
I knew in an instant the rug rats were better.
Away to the stairs, I flew like a flash,
I’m too old for that, so I fell on my ass.
The jelly smeared handprints on my once pristine walls,
Tell all who may enter that kids roam these halls.
When what to my bleeding eyes should appear,
But two little girls, their cheeks streaked with tears.
I knew in a moment which one to beat.
More rapid than eagles, my temper did grow,
The brats all scattered before I could blow.
“Now rug rats, & yard apes, & all kids of mine!
Stay out of my face, I’ve run short on time!”
“To your rooms, to the neighbours, I really don’t care,
Just dash away, dash away, get out of my hair!”
And it’s back to the cooking & cleaning for me,
The shopping, the wrapping, no time to go pee!
With the cat eating tinsel, & the cookies all burnt,
My wine glass is empty & I wish it weren’t.
As I frantically searched all the cupboards & shelves,
I wondered if Santa could spare me some elves.
Little green men to do all my bidding,
And deal with the rug rats screaming & hitting.
Instead here I am, dressed like a slob,
With tape in my hair, & flour in globs.
A bundle of toys, still left to wrap,
Taunting me cruelly, as I try to nap.
My eyes, they are bleary, my ears they are ringing,
From the incessant noise of Dora’s singing.
My droll little mouth, drawn down in a frown,
As I once again neglect my virtual Town.
The empty wine glass, held tight in my hand,
Begs to be filled, but sadly I can’t.
Mustn’t get sloshed with so much to do,
If Mommy doesn’t do it, the question is who?
For it all falls to us at this time of year,
To handle it all & spread Christmas cheer.
A blink of my eyes, & a shake of my head,
Soon helped sweep away my feeling of dread.
I will get it done, I must set to work,
The joy it will bring them, my one real perk.
And laying aside the glass I’ll fill later,
I finish up wrapping, even Darth Vader.
Finally it’s done, & Mom can relax,
Head to her blog & poetically wax.
But worth every moment, for my children, my light,
So Merry Christmas to all, & to all a good night!
Wishing a safe & joyous holiday to all of you! I am truly blessed for the friendships I have gained here in Crazy Town, & for all of the wonderful friends I have in the real world who have supported me in my virtual one! And since it is Friday, & I think this qualifies as “funny”, I have included Mr. Linky just in case any of you managed to find a spare moment amidst your own chaos to throw up a post today!
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